Last Time: Julian, Marwan’s brother, has joined Marwan, in what is sure to be some yet unidentified bad guy stuff. Badabing KaChing has been exposed as a wanted man, was captured and then somehow escapes enroute to CTU. A savage outbreak of Barry Manilow karaoke has been released on CTU, much to the dismay of everyone, most especially Marwan, who wanted something even worse…. probably something like Yanni. Jack, Curtis and Chloe are horrified to find out that Ex-President Manilow has become a TV evangelist.
The following occurred between 7pm and 8pm, with ranch dressing, on the side.
7:00 pm – As they’re watching the billboard showing Ex-President Manilow’s new career as TV evangelist, Jack turns to Curtis and asks him to bring up channel 43. Curtis pulls the car over to the side of the road, and plays with some dials on the console of the car. He can’t bring anything up, so Jack tries, too. Nothing. Chloe sighs, presses a couple of buttons on her wristwatch, and a 3D holographic projection of channel 43 shows up in mid-air in front of them.
7:02 pm – Manilow, wearing a remarkably bad toupee, is standing in front of a bank of people waiting by telephones. Manilow is pleading with viewers to send in any money they can. A few phones ring in the background. He tells viewers that the money is going to go for a very good cause. A few more phones start ringing. He tells viewers that with just a few donations, he could become president again. All the phones that had been ringing suddenly stop. From the reaction of the people on the telephones in the background, everyone they were talking to must have hung up. Manilow’s left eye twitches a bit, as he tries to smile.
7:04 pm – Curtis, Chloe and Jack agree that probably is one of the worst things they’ve seen on television, and that includes “The Simple Life”. A lady taps on the glass of Jack’s car window. Jack rolls down the window, and the lady asks Jack for his autograph. Jack signs it, and asks the lady why she would want his autograph. The lady looks a little taken aback by this, and says that she enjoys his show. She looks around, and asks if they’re filming right now. Jack looks back at Chloe and Curtis. They both shrug. Jack turns to the lady and asks whether she’s been trying to find him for a while or not. The lady replies that she’s waited outside of the film studio for a few days, but never saw him, so she’s thrilled. Jack asks which studio, and she replies on one on Pico Blvd. Jack thanks her, and Jack tells Curtis to drive there.
7:07 pm – Marwan is furious that the gas attack attempt at CTU failed to kill anyone, and that he himself shot about seven of his own henchmen and thugs in the process. Julian tells Marwan that he shot those guys in the chest, not the process, and Marwan tells him to shut up. The phone rings. Marwan answers it, and talks on a speaker phone. It’s the Hollywood Looking Terrorist Mastermind (HLTM). He tells Marwan that Jack is now headed for a television studio, and now would be a perfect opportunity to get rid of Jack once and for all. Julian says he’s going to set his phaser on kill.
7:09 pm – HLTM calls the KFC on the QT to order BBQ to be delivered ASAP and not via UPS or DHL or worse via USPS. KFC says it’ll be there PDQ if that would be AOK.
7:14 pm – Jack says that everything that’s been happening today has to be tied together somehow, but can’t figure out how. Jack’s phone rings. It’s Madam Haig! She tells Jack that she’s been brought back into CTU because Bill has been incapacitated, but that Bill should be OK in a few hours. Jack starts to ask her a question, and she interrupts, saying that he hasn’t filled out any TPS reports on what happened yesterday, and she needs them right away. Jack makes some buzzing noises into the phone, tells her the line has a lot of static on it, and hangs up on her.
7:16 pm – Curtis, Jack and Chloe drive up to a Hollywood Studio. As they drive up to the guard gate, the guard takes one look at them and waves them through. Jack tells Curtis to park the car.
7:17 pm – We hear gunshots! Jack sprints towards where the gunshots came from, Curtis and Chloe running behind him. He turns the corner, and sees a man facing away from him yelling, “I’m from CTU! Put down your weapons and come out with your hands up!” A voice over a loudspeaker yells, “And, CUT!” Curtis and Chloe catch up with Jack. The man turns around. He looks just like Jack!
7:20 pm – Chloe says, “OK, things are getting a little ‘Twilight Zone-y’ here”. The man sees Jack, Curtis and Chloe standing there, and starts to walk over to them. There’s a huge explosion across the lot where the man was standing just moments before. The man is thrown to the ground.
7:23 pm – Jack’s phone rings. It’s Madam Haig again. She tells Jack not to hang up. She says that she had nothing to do with what he’s seeing right now. Jack says that’s great, because neither did he. Jack asks her what the heck is going on. There’s total chaos everywhere. Curtis points up at the roof at a man pulling a grenade launcher off his shoulder. Jack goes running towards that building. Haig explains that they’ve sold the rights to what’s been happening to Jack and CTU to a television production company. Jack says that he doesn’t have time for this, and hangs up again. He runs up several flights of stairs.
7:25 pm – Jack reaches the roof of the building, bursts through, and stops short. The man that fired the grenade launcher is pointing the gun at Jack! He tells Jack, “Marwan will be happy to see that you’re dead, Mr. Bauer”. Jack points up at the sky and says, “Look out! A robot!” The man says, “Nice try, Mr…” and WHAM! He gets hit with what looks like a HUGE chicken leg. The man goes hurdling across the sky, landing with a crash several blocks away. RoboEdgar hit the guy with one of Godzilla’s barbequed legs! RoboEdgar moves towards Jack, and says “Glowie toed Edgar two hep Jag.” Chloe and Curtis burst through to the roof, as Jack pats RoboEdgar on the shoulder and says, “Good job, Edgar. Good job.”
7:27 pm – Jack is talking with some of the authorities that have arrived on the scene after the explosion. Jack phone rings. Jack puts it on speakerphone mode, and yells into the phone that he doesn’t have time for this. Marwan’s voice over the phone, says, “Oh, I think you’ll have time for this, Mr. Bauer. You see, I have Ms. Raines in a situation that I think you’ll be interested in. You’ll find her at 5333 Zoo Drive.”
7:29 pm – Jack turns pale. Chloe just says, “Oh, oh. This isn’t good.” She sees Curtis’ perplexed look, and tells him that the one place that Jack doesn’t like to go is the zoo.
7:34 pm – Curtis is driving Jack and Chloe to the Los Angeles Zoo. RoboEdgar follows along behind. Well, above and behind. He’s flying over the car. Everyone in the car is oblivious to the number of car accidents that this is causing because of people seeing a large flying robot. Jack is looking straight ahead and mumbling to himself.
7:37 pm – Curtis asks what’s wrong with the zoo. Upon hearing the word “Zoo”, Jack twitches and continues to talk to himself. Chloe tells Curtis not to use that word again, and explains that early in his career at CTU, Jack was attacked at a Zoo, and it brings up a lot of bad memories for him. Curtis looks like he doesn’t believe Chloe, and suggests that they take Jack to see the elephants, zebras and snakes. Jack doesn’t seem to be convinced.
7:40 pm – Chloe goes on to explain that the attack wasn’t from an enemy; it was when he had taken his daughter Kim to the zoo. Jack got a little to close to the snake pit, and he fell in. They had been able to get Jack back out again, but he never wanted to go to the zoo again.
7:43 pm – Chloe tells Jack that everything is going to be OK. It’s time that he faces the one fear that he has in his life. Jack asks if she means seeing Manilow as president again. Chloe tells him the OTHER fear in his life. Jack says, “Oh, you mean hearing Audrey sing?” Chloe shudders, and says, “OK, never mind. Listen to me Jack. This is about snakes”. Jack seems a lot calmer now, but still hesitant.
7:48 pm – They arrive at the Los Angeles Zoo, just as it is closing. Jack flashes his CTU badge, and they enter the zoo. Jack’s phone rings. It’s Marwan. He says, “Very good, Mr. Bauer. Now, we have a bomb placed somewhere in the zoo. Let’s see if you can find it.”
7:52 pm – Jack, Chloe, and Curtis head towards the reptile building. RoboEdgar has wandered off some place. Jack seems to be getting more and more nervous. Suddenly, he stops. Jack says, “Look, you two might think this is an irrational fear. I’m telling you right now, there are reports on news every single day of snakes being everywhere they shouldn’t be. I read about this stuff on the Internet all the time – There are websites that post news like this all the time! I could be wrong, but I don’t think so.”
7:53 pm – Chloe rolls her eyes, and mumbles, “I can’t believe I’m going to say this”. She says, “Jack, you have to do this. You have to do this to save….AAARGH. Curtis, I can’t say it. YOU say it.” Curtis shakes his head, and says, “Jack? You have to do this for Audrey, Jack.” Now it’s Curtis’ turn to shudder.
7:54 pm – They enter the reptile building. Jack says that they better leave, because it sounds like a gas leak in there. Chloe punches him in the arm, and tells him that hissing noise is coming from all the snakes. They make their way around the exhibits, but don’t see anyone. In fact, there’s a lot of hissing, but they only see one snake. The extra hissing noise seems to be coming from speaker. They notice a sign-out sheet, which is apparently used by the zoo to keep track of who has rented snakes for the night.
7:57 pm – There’s a strange noise coming from outside that’s getting louder and louder. Jack recognizes the noise and tells Curtis and Chloe they have to get out of the building as fast as they can. They run through the doors, and they see two planes headed right for the snake house. They run as fast as they can, and the plane crashes into the building, causing a huge explosion. Curtis looks back on the building and says, “Huh…. I guess that’s “Planes on a Snake.” Chloe threatens to taser him.
7:59pm – There’s a huge amount of screaming happening nearby. They all start running for the noise, and run straight for the monkey cages. Jack’s phone rings. It’s Marwan, and he says “Ah, I see you’ve found her. I wish you luck, Mr. Bauer, that bomb is set to go off any time now”. Jack looks around, and realizes that all the monkeys are on either side of the cage trying to get away from whatever is in the middle. The monkey look completely freaked out to be anywhere near the object in the middle of the cage. As he steps closer, Jack realizes…. It’s Audrey, and she’s surrounded by the rest of the snakes from the reptile house! It’s not apparent if the monkeys are more freaked out about the snakes or Audrey.
8:00 pm – Time’s up!