Category: Television

NOTE: Some of you may have noticed that while the episode said it took place between “12 midnight and 1 am”, the actual times were listed in the episode as running from 1 am to 2 am. This was completely due to the fact that the number twelve key on my keyboard was broken last week. Rest assured that the keyboard in question has been severely reprimanded, and there’s a 50-50 chance this won’t happen again.

24 – Two Days Later – Hour 7

The following takes place between 1 am and 2 am (really, I mean in this time)

1:00 am – Chloe, Morris, Bill and Jack stand in front of the door for a moment, when Morris starts to reach for the doorbell. Actually, it’s not so much a doorbell as it is some kind of old-fashioned door knob. Chloe stops him by yelling, “Will you just wait a minute? I’m sick and tired of what’s happening around here! One minute we’re back home, the next minute we’re in someone’s house. Then we’re in outer space! THEN Jack nearly gets killed by a giant robotic squirrel! And all this time, we’re chasing around Cheng, and God knows how many ninjas, or terrorists, or whatever they are! And your very next reaction is to just go along with things, and try and see who’s behind that door? I want to know what’s going on around here, and I want to know RIGHT NOW!”

1:02 am – Everyone is a bit taken aback by Chloe’s outburst and stands silently for a minute. Jack finally says, “Look Chloe, we’re doing the best we can. We can’t panic. We’re all trying to figure this out. Before we do anything else, we need to get in touch with CTU. The best thing we can do is try to find a federal courthouse or a police precinct.”

Bill and Morris agree, and Chloe seems satisfied. Bill says, “Let’s get out of here. This abandoned house is creepy.”

1:04 am – They start to walk towards the front wrought-iron gate of the house, which is unlocked and swinging in the wind. The cement walkway is lined on either side with dead flowers, and what little grass there is in the lawn is dead. The address on the gate is “0001 Cemetery Ridge”. As they walk onto the sidewalk next to the street, the gate slams closed and bolts itself shut behind them.

1:06 am – They start heading towards what appears to be the main part of town. As they walk Morris says, “Well, let’s go through what we know. When we were in the warehouse, there was a computer wired up to that arch. After we went through, it was like a one way trip: We couldn’t go back because the arch had turned into a solid wall!”

Bill says, “And the thing I don’t understand is how we could be flipping around between all these places, but at the same time we keep finding the terrorists we’ve been chasing after.”
Chloe says, “Whatever has been making us move between these places must be doing the same thing to them. If I could only get my hands on that computer…”

1:07 am – They walk past some storefronts before reaching a police station. They walk up the steps and go in. At the main desk, a police officer argues with someone on the phone, “I’m not going to argue with you any more. I’m not going out there no matter what kind of howling or explosions you hear. …. Yeah, Yeah… I love you too, Mom.” He hangs up the phone, and asks Jack, “What can I do for you?”

1:08 am – Jack holds up his badge and says, “My name is Jack Bauer. We’re all with the Counter Terrorism Unit in Los Angeles. Our phones don’t work, and we need to reach someone there to help us. Can I use your phone?”

The officer looks at him suspiciously and says, “Counter Terrorism Unit? Like soda fountain counters? What kind of place is that?”

Jack says, “Look, all I want is to be able to talk to my superiors, I’d appreciate it if you’d give me a phone.”

The officer shrugs and hands Jack the phone. Chloe says, “Jack, wait. We’ve been through this before. We can’t get CTU on the phone. We’re going to need some help from the people here.” Jack dials anyway, and gets a recording saying that the number he dialed isn’t in service. Chloe smirks.

1:10 am – Morris says, “We have to think about this. Every place we’ve gone, we’ve seen the terrorists nearby. We haven’t had to go far, and sometimes we’re nearly on top of them when we arrive. Shouldn’t we go back to that old mansion on Cemetery Ridge?”

The officer at the desk interrupts Morris, “Cemetery Ridge? You mean the Addams house?”

Bill says, “I don’t know if it’s the Addams house, but the address is 0001 Cemetery Ridge.”

The officer says, “Well, you’re on your own then. None of my guys are going there with you.”

Another officer standing nearby says, “Yeah, they’re creepy and they’re kooky!”

A third officer agrees, “They’re altogether ookie!”

Morris says, “What’s ‘ookie’?”

The officer says, “I’m not sure. It just sounded like the thing to say.”

Commercial

1:16 am – Jack, Chloe, Morris and Bill are back on the street headed back towards to the mansion where they first arrived. Morris says, “I can’t believe the police won’t go to this place. Do they think it’s haunted or something?”

Jack says, “Never mind that. I’ve been thinking. That knife that I had from that space ship… Doesn’t it seem a little weird to you that I still had it? Everything else around us changes radically, but I was able to bring that with me?”

Chloe says, “Not necessarily.” She pats her purse. “We still have everything we’ve been carrying around since this whole thing started. Whenever we switch to a new place, the only things that have come through have been us and whatever we’re carrying. You probably brought that knife and that ray gun with you, just by having them with you when we switched to wherever this is.”

1:18 am – They arrive at 0001 Cemetery Ridge. Jack says, “We’ll go in through the front door. We arrived at that door together when we first got here, so that’s the best bet.”

Bill says, “Won’t that be dangerous?”

Jack replies, “Well look at it this way. Every time we go in the back way, someone shoots at us. This way they’ll be taken completely by surprise.

Morris reaches for the handle on the gate, and the gate opens by itself! Bill seems startled by this, but Morris isn’t as impressed. “I’m sure this is some sort of ‘home automation’ device. It’s rigged to open whenever someone gets near it.” They walk the pathway up to the house.

Bill reaches the door first, and opens the door. The door opens slightly and then slams shut. Bill opens the door again, and this time holds the door handle to keep it open. A hand appears from around the door and slaps Bill’s hand. Bill is so startled that he lets go and the door slams shut again.

1:20 am – They all look at each other. Jack steps forward and just as he reaches for the door handle, the door opens. Inside the door is the largest man any of them have ever seen. He looks like he hasn’t gotten any sleep in a very long time. His face is pale, and there are rings under his eyes. He’s dressed as a butler. The man stares at them, but doesn’t say anything. Jack finally speaks up, “Ah, hello. My name is Jack Bauer. We’re here to see the person that’s in charge.”
The man says, “Follow me.”

1:22 am – They follow the man into the house down a small hallway. The inside of the house is elaborately decorated with hunting trophies, strange looking furniture, and wild looking portraits. The man reaches some steps at the end of the hallway. He says, “Jack Bauer.”

They all step up to the edge of the steps and a croquette ball hits Morris in the middle of the forehead and knocks him out.

Commercial

1:27 am – Morris starts to wake up, but he seems out of it. Morris blinks a couple of times at the woman kneeling next to him. She has long black hair and is wearing a long black dress. She holds up three fingers and says, “What color is this?” Morris says, “Uh… Hamburger?” She turns to someone behind them, “Gomez, he’s fine. Nothing that a little hemlock won’t cure.” Chloe, Bill and Jack give each other looks as though they were trying to figure out if they heard what they just thought they heard. The woman gets up and shuffles down the stairs and into the living room. Chloe turns to Morris and says, “Morris, are you O.K.?”

1:29 am – “Morticia helps me every time that happens! A little glue and that croquette ball will be in shape in no time!” says Gomez. Gomez has black hair and a thin black moustache.

Jack stands up with some help from Bill. Jack says, “We’re looking for the person in charge. Are you in charge here?”
Gomez says, “Oh! You’ll want Fester!” He steps over to a hangman’s noose that’s hanging from the ceiling and pulls on it. A very loud gong sounds. Morris falls over again. Jack, Chloe and Bill barely keep their balance. Morticia and Gomez aren’t affected by the noise.

The tall man from before walks out from a room behind Gomez and says, “You rang?”

1:33 am – Gomez replies, “Lurch! Get Fester, would you?” He then turns to Jack, and says, “Fester will be here in a moment.” Gomez asks Morticia, “Now where were we? Can I have a ruling on that last shot? It was about to go through those wickets before it….. Fester!” Gomez turns to a man on the stairs.

1:34 am – Everyone turns and sees a man dressed in a black robe with a fur collar. He has a light bulb in his mouth, and it’s lit! Fester says, “Hiya!”

Gomez tells Jack, “Fester is more ‘in charge’ than anyone else I know!”

Jack says, “That’s not what I meant! I meant, ‘Who’s the head of the household?’”

Gomez says, “Well, why didn’t you say so? That would be Great Uncle Snerk, wouldn’t it, Tish?”

“Oh, yes. He’s had his head in that jar for years now. Loves it in there. The only time I’ve ever heard him complain about it is when Cousin Phlegm poured champagne into his tank. He said it made his nose all bubbly!”

Morticia says, “Why don’t you all get a bit more comfortable.” Fester pulls up a chair for Chloe.

Jack feels something at his side. He looks down and sees that a hand reaching out from a box has grabbed the phaser in his pocket, and it pulling it back into the box! Jack grabs the phaser. Jack arms are pulled down into the box all the way up to his armpits!

Fester says, “Oh, that’s just Thing. He’s just helping you put things away!”

Jack yells, “It’s doing something to my hands!”

Fester says, “I told you before, that’s THING. Cousin Itt is over there!” A short creature covered with hair shambles into the room, and says something unintelligible.

Jack finally pulls his hands free, and he looks at his hands to make sure they’re O.K. He does a double take and says, “Hey! My hands are manicured!”

Commercial

1:39 am – Lurch appears from another room and announces “Lunch!”

Morticia shuffles over to Chloe, “Oh, you pure dear! You look absolutely famished! You really must stay for lunch.”

Chloe welcomes this hospitality, and says, “Thanks, I’m not feeling very well. I’m pregnant, and I think we all are a bit hungry.”

Morticia says, “You’re going to have a baby? How exciting? Do you know what it’s going to be?”
Chloe says that she hopes it’s a boy, Morris is hoping for a girl. Morticia says, “Boy? Girl? Young people have no imagination these days. How disappointing.” She turns to ask Lurch, “Lurch, be a dear, and pop a few more wombats into the oven, s’il vous plait?”

Gomez says, “TISH! That’s French!” He starts kissing Morticia on the arm.

Morticia reminds him, “Company, darling! Company!”

Gomez says, “Oh, of course… Where are my manners? Off to lunch!”

Chloe leans over to Jack, “Wombats? I’m not eating wombats! This place gives me the creeps!”

Morticia seems a little surprised, “No, dear, I’m sorry. We just had the last of the creeps for breakfast this morning. We’re having a bit of a treat tonight, since wombat is one of Uncle Fester’s favorites.”

1:43 am – There’s a loud explosion from somewhere outside. Jack yells, “WHAT WAS THAT?”

Gomez seems surprised that Jack is so alarmed. “Why, I think that’s just Pugsley out playing in the backyard.”
Fester says, “Gomez, isn’t Pugsley still at Camp Crystal Lake?”

Gomez thinks about that a second, and says, “By Jove, you’re right!”

Morticia says, “Then it must be those nice Chinese Building Inspectors.”

Bill, Chloe, Morris and Jack, say, “Chinese Building Inspectors? What Chinese Building Inspectors?” all at the same time.

They all look at each other, and Bill says, “O.K…. That was weird.”

1:45 am – Morticia asks Gomez, “When we sent them out back, do you think we should have mentioned the children’s mine field?”
Jack yells, “Those men are wanted terrorists! How do we get out there?” Fester volunteers to take them to the backyard.

Commercial

1:51 am – Jack, Bill, Chloe and Morris emerge from the back of the mansion, “How big is this place? It took a long time to get out here in the back yard.” Fester confesses that he gave the scenic route, since they don’t have guests that stay very long. Gomez opens a door the leads from the house to the backyard, and says, “If you didn’t want the scenic route, you could have just taken this to the backyard.”

1:53 am – Jack says, “We’re wasting time! Where are they?”

Gomez says, “Well, the last time someone did something like this, we found them down by the swamp. And in that tree. And in that tree over there….”

Lurch points to the mansion roof, and says, “Mr. Addams….”

Everyone looks up, and we can see several of the terrorists climbing up the outside of the Addams mansion.

1:55 am – Jack says, “What’s the best way to get up there?”

Fester says, “I sleep up in that belfry! I’ll show you the way!” He starts to go back inside the house.

Jack hesitates and says, “We don’t have enough time. I have to get up there, NOW!” He looks around, and realizes the answer is standing there right in front of him. Jack says, “Lurch! You have to give me a boost to the roof so I can climb up!”
Lurch shakes his head and grunts, “Uhhhhhhhhh…..”

Gomez says, “Come on, old man!”

This small amount of urging convinces Lurch, and he cups his hands for Jack to step into.

Gomez continues, “It’s just like when we play Heads and Tails!”

Jack hears this and says, “Wait a minute…What did …. AHHHHH!” Lurch stands up quickly and lifts with all his might, sending Jack flying through the air. He goes past the edge of the roof that he hoped to climb to, past the terrorists climbing up the building, and past the very top of the roof. He hangs in mid-air for a split second, and starts coming down again.

1:57 am – A large net comes out of the belfry, and catches Jack. He’s dazed, and sees that Thing is there with Cousin Itt. Jack starts to say something, and Cousin Itt starts jabbering away in some unintelligible language. They pull Jack over to the edge of the belfry and Jack asks Thing for his phaser. Thing disappears into the floor boards.

1:58 am – Jack sees the terrorists converging on a gargoyle attached to the building. They’re trying to pry it off its perch. Jack hears a scream from the ground, and looks down to see Chloe, Morris and Bill surrounded by the terrorists. Jack leans out from where he’s standing in the belfry and yells, “Leave them alone! I’m coming to help you!”

1:59 am – A metallic voice behind Jack says, “But who will help you, Jack?” Jack turns around. There’s a man dressed completely in black on the landing next to where Jack is standing. The hairy creature tries to kick the man in the shin, but it doesn’t have any effect. He’s wearing a black hood with a metal screen over the area where his mouth is. Jack tries to kick the man in the face, but the man is too quick! He grabs Jack’s foot by the heel, and pushes with all his might! Jack goes tumbling backwards off the building headed to the ground below.

There’s a bright flash.

Jack materializes in mid-air and falls into a swimming pool

2:00 am – Time’s up!

This SPECIAL EDITION of “24 – Two Days Later” has additional contributors. I’d like to thank Annie Where-but-here for the majority of commercials, Mike Weasel, and Mad Scientist Weasel for creating most of the pictures used for the web links in the story. I would also like to thank TropicHunt.com Guy for providing a pointer to one photo in particular from the massive TropicHunt.com archives.

So, why the special contributions for commercials and pictures for this edition? Read on and find out!

24 – Two Days Later – Hour 6

The following takes place between 12 midnight and 1 am

12:00 am – The man in the Ferrari looks very impatient. He keeps looking around, as if he expects someone to see them. Jack stands up, and walks to the Ferrari. He asks, “Who are you, and why should I get in this car?” The man says, “Didn’t they tell you anything? The name’s Sonny Crockett, I’m with Miami Vice. Now GET IN BEFORE SOMEONE STARTS SHOOTING!” Jack jumps into the car without opening the door first. They speed off.

As they speed off, loud music starts playing. Jack looks around and realize that the car itself is playing music as they drive.

Crockett continues, “What’s the matter? Haven’t you been briefed? Lt. Castillo must be losing his touch.”

Jack says, “Look, I’ve had a hard day, and I need to find my friends. We got separated.” Jack looks down at the Klingon knife he’s holding. “It’s been a weird day.” Jack looks up, and the sun is high in the sky. Jack looks at his watch, and according to it, it’s “12:00 am”. He says, “I don’t even know what the time really is.” Jack holds the knife up to examine the handle.

Crockett says, “Put that away.” He looks at his watch. “It’s 7:00pm. My regular partner is on vacation, and I’m supposed to be too. We’re running low on man power, and they asked me to fill in. We just have just make a routine stop. You’re just there to back me up in case something goes wrong.” They continue to drive. He tells Jack, “You sure dress funny. How long have you lived in South Florida? Don’t you know we have a dress code here?”

12:02 am – In a neighborhood somewhere in Miami, there’s a party going on in the back of someone’s home. Everyone is dressed in Miami style clothing, so there’s more than enough pink and turquoise to go around.

(Yes, that does describe nearly ALL of Miami, but in this particular case many famous authors are there. How famous? REALLY famous. So famous you wouldn’t believe it. Let’s put in this way: Shakespeare would be right at home… if he dressed in a white suit and pink shirt. You get the idea).

Some people dressed in black make their way along the side of the house, out of view of the people in the backyard. They come across an open window, and climb inside of the house.
Continue reading “24 – Two Days Later – 12 midnight to 1 am”

24 – Two Days Later – Hour 5

The following takes place between 11 pm and 12 midnight

11:00 pm – Jack and Bill are completely disoriented. The side of Jack’s face is bleeding. Some men wearing red shirts run towards Jack and Bill, but none of them seems to want to be the person in the lead. It looks like they’re all afraid to be first. Jack thinks he and Bill are in danger and tries to shoot his gun, but it won’t fire! He tries a couple more times, but it just clicks. Finally, in frustration, Jack throws his gun at the men. The gun hits some kind of invisible barrier and bounces to the floor. Bill starts to run away from the men, takes about two steps, and hits another invisible barrier and falls to the ground.

The men on the other side of the barrier see the gun bounce to the ground and start laughing nervously as Bill gets up. One of them says, “Wow! That’s the first time we’ve ever been in a fight and one of us DIDN’T die. No one is going to believe us!”

11:02 pm – “I’ll believe you, Mister,” says a man in a yellow shirt as he arrives to the scene. He’s followed by a tall man with black hair, and strange ears. Bill leans over to Jack and says, “That guy looks like he had his head caught in a mechanical rice-picker!”

The man in yellow continues, “Your weapons were disabled as soon as you came aboard, thanks to Mr. Spock here. Now, do you mind telling me what you’re doing on my ship?”

Jack and Bill look at each other. Jack realizes he doesn’t have much to bargain with, so he decides to tell the truth, “My name is Jack Bauer. I work for CTU Los Angeles. This is Bill Buchanan We have been chasing after some terrorists for the last few hours. Every hour…. come to think of it, nearly EXACTLY every hour, we get thrown some new place.”
Bill says, “We’ve been in a house with a family, to an island, in a bar, and now we’re at sea aboard whatever kind of ship this is you have here.”

Spock says, “Fascinating! Captain, I believe these men are telling the truth. From their appearance, I would say they were from the late twentieth or early twenty-first century. How they got here, I’m not certain.”

Bill says, “Wait, wait, wait….what did you just say….?”

The Captain says to Bill, “What makes you think you’re at sea?”

Bill says, “Well, you did say you were on a ship. Where else would it be?”

11:04 pm – The man in yellow looks at Spock and says, “I believe you’re right.” He addresses Jack and Bill, “Gentleman, you’re aboard the U.S.S Enterprise. You’re not at sea, you’re aboard a starship! I’m Captain James T. Kirk.”

Jack asks, “What century is this?”

Spock raises an eye brow, “In human terms, you’re in the twenty-third century.”

Bill throws up his hands in frustration, “Well that’s just great!” Bill starts pacing around.

Spock says, “We’re docked at Starbase Alpha-Centi-Muldooni-Solati-Gelato 12, orbiting Beta-Mega-Ultra-Vita-Meta-Vegamin….”

Kirk says to Spock, “Wait, I thought we were at Starbase Beta-Mega-Ultra-Vita-Meta-Vegamin orbiting, Alpha-Centi-Muldooni-Solati-Gelato 12… ?”

Spock says, “A common mistake, the people of…”

11:05 pm – Jack interrupts, “Look we’re missing two of our people. We have to find them.”

Kirk doesn’t seem all that concerned, “We’ll do a scan for them on the ship and ask the starbase to do the same. In the mean time, you should go down to sick bay and have that looked at.”

11:07 pm – Morris and Chloe are in a bar, somewhere on the star base. The other people in the bar are completely oblivious to them. Chloe is having an argument with the computer they’re using to order drinks. She says, “All I want is a Seven-up!”

The computer replies, “That is an ancient beverage. Please request something more modern… and while you’re at it, pick something better to wear, dear.” Morris tells her to quiet down and to stop drawing attention to herself. Chloe ignores this and threatens to dismantle the computer.

Meanwhile, one of the Chinese terrorists is sitting at the far end of the bar watching Chloe and Morris.

Commercial

11:12 pm – Jack and Bill are in sick bay. Jack is sitting on a table jutting out from the wall. He’s being looked after by someone who’s introduced himself as Dr. McCoy. A nurse stands nearby, holding a clipboard. Jack says, “What can you tell us about what’s going on here? What’s happened since the twenty-first century?”

Dr. McCoy yells, “I’m a doctor, not a historian! Now, sit still!” He pulls out a little cylinder and holds it over Jack. The top of it starts to flash and make a weird noise.

Jack asks, “What is that?”
Dr. McCoy stops and looks at the cylinder. “I use it to calm people down. This really doesn’t do anything.” He throws the cylinder over his shoulder. Dr. McCoy says, “Now hold still.”

11:13 pm – Somewhere on the ship, there’s a loud explosion. Both the nurse and Dr. McCoy stumble over to the left side of the room, pause for a minute, and then stumble over the right side of the room. Jack and Bill don’t move at all.

Bill asks, “Why are you doing that?”

McCoy looks at him and says, “You know, I’m not sure. Back at the academy, they told us whenever we heard an explosion we had to stumble to our left and then to our right. Sometimes we stumble to our right and then back over to the left. If it’s really bad, sometimes we do it a couple of times.”

Jack asks, “Does that help?”

McCoy shrugs, “Not really.”

11:14 pm – A speaker near Jack’s bed plays a whistling noise, and a woman’s voice says, “Dr. McCoy, Captain Kirk has requested that you beam down to the planet immediately. Someone has taken a shuttle craft from the starbase to the planet, and he wants to investigate.”

McCoy tells Jack, “You go get yourself down to the bar on the starbase. Nurse Chapel will take you there. Don’t worry. We’ll find your friends for you.”

Before Jack can say anything, McCoy leaves.

11:15 pm – The nurse escorts Bill and Jack through the ship and onto the starbase. Bill and Jack discuss what to do next. They take a few turns and enter a bar. Chloe and Morris see Jack and Bill immediately, and run up to them. The nurse says, “I guess you found your friends!”

Chloe looks at the nurse and says, “Your voice is that same as the one the computer uses.”

The nurse says, “Uh… That’s a complete coincidence!”, and runs out of the bar.

11:16 pm – Chloe gives Jack a hug, and while she’s doing so, she sees the Chinese terrorist that is sitting across the room. Chloe whispers, “Jack, behind you!” Jack quickly turns around. The terrorist jumps up, points his gun at Jack and tries to shoot. Nothing happens.

Jack runs towards the man, first stepping onto a chair, then onto a table, and yells as he leaps from table to tackle the terrorist. They struggle, until Jack gets them better of him. Jack yells, “What have you been doing! Why has this been happening? Why are you here?”

The terrorist starts to laugh, but stops when Jack tightens his grip. Jack reaches for a bar glass, smashes it and shoves the jagged-edge glass right into the guy’s leg. The man screams. Jack yells, “WHY ARE YOU HERE?”

The terrorist yells, “Gathering Trilithium….gathering trilithium! Please stop!” Red-shirted security guards surround Jack.

11:18 pm – Another man in a red shirt, someone who looks a bit older than the others, comes into the bar and sees Jack. He says, “What are you doing, lad? Don’t you know you can’t just go doing that around here?”

Jack apologizes, “I’m sorry, that man attacked me, and I have to know what they’re doing so I can put a stop to it.”

The man shakes his head, “No, no… I’m talking about the whiskey glass you just smashed! What an awful shame! Who’s that?”

Jack explains that this is one of the men that he’s been looking for, and asks to see Captain Kirk. The man tells everyone his name is Mr. Scott, chief engineer. Mr. Scott tells them he’ll take them to see Captain Kirk personally. “He asked me to keep an eye on you”, says Mr. Scott. Mr. Scott orders, “Take this man to the brig, and have Nurse Chapel go there to treat him.”

11:19 pm – Everyone follows Mr. Scott into a room. In the room, a man is standing by a control panel in front of a platform. The man tells everyone to get up onto platform, and stand on one of the pads. Morris starts singing, “STOP! In the Name of Love!” complete with hand gestures, but when no one else joins his impromptu singing, he stops.

Mr. Scott tells a man that there are five to “beam down” to Captain Kirk’s location, and joins everyone on the platform.

11:20 pm – A second later, they’re all standing with Captain Kirk, Spock, and McCoy. There are bushes and trees all around them. They can see towers rising above a town in the distance. Bill asks, “What the heck just happened?”

Spock replies, “Your molecular structure was broken down, transmitted to the surface of this planet, and then reassembled.” Bill gives him a blank stare.

McCoy leans over and tells Bill, “He means they scrambled you up there, and sent you down here. How many fingers am I holding up?” He holds up three fingers.

Bill says, “Three… ?”

McCoy says, “Good! You’re fine. Sometimes if that thing isn’t calibrated right…. Well, let’s just say the last person I asked how many figures I was holding up answered ‘Tibet’”.

11:21 pm – Kirk says, “Ah, now I have all my senior officers here. Good! Now let’s get going!”
Jack looks at him and says, “Uh… I have a question: If you’ve got all your senior officers down here…. What’s going on back at your ship?”

[The scene briefly shifts to show a wild party happening aboard the Enterprise].

Mr. Scott says, “Never mind that! The lad here found one of the people he’s after!”

11:22 pm – Jack explains what happened at the bar on the starbase while they’re walking along the path to town. Mr. Scott yells, “Everyone take cover!” They dive for the bushes, and several men walk past. They’re dressed in some kind of military outfits, and they have green faces.”

Mr. Scott whispers, “Klingons!”

Commercial

11:25 pm – Morris asks, “What the heck are cling ons?”
Kirk explains, “Klingons! Klingons! They’re a savage race of alien warriors who value combat and honor above all else. They will stop at nothing to gain control of the galaxy!” Bill whispers to Jack, “Sounds like Microsoft”.

Morris says, “Aliens? They look human! Well… humans with green skin and prosthetic foreheads… but still! They look pretty human to me.”

McCoy says, “What? You don’t see how different they look than us? What’s wrong with you?” He pulls out something that looks like a cassette recorder and starts waving it around Morris.

11:26 pm – Kirk tells Jack, “Things have just gotten more dangerous. You’re going to need one of these.” Kirk hands Jack something that looks like a toy ray gun.

Jack says, “What’s this supposed to…..” He accidentally pulls the trigger and vaporizes a bird. Jack is impressed, “I could get used to this!”

11:27 pm – Kirk tells Jack, “Be careful with that thing! You had it on the strongest setting and could have killed any one of us!”

Jack asks what other settings there are, and Spock explains, “The standard issue phaser has nine settings: Nudge, Bother, Tickle, Astonish, Stun, Baffle, Clench, Fry and Kill.”

They all head towards the city.

Commercial

11:33 pm – Spock says, “I have to warn you, this planet is rich with Dihydrogen Monoxide, a substance known to case burns in gaseous form and it can kill if inhaled.”
Bill looks very alarmed until Chloe says, “Dihydrogen Monoxide is WATER!” She turns to Spock and says, “What’s wrong with you?”

McCoy tells her, “Don’t worry about him. He tells that joke to everyone. Some kind of Vulcan humor.”

Morris says, “So, he’s an alien too? I should have guessed from the prosthetic ears…”

11:35 pm – McCoy says, “This doesn’t make any sense. What would the Klingons be trying to accomplish by coming to a planet near a Star Fleet starbase, when they know the dangers involved?”

Mr. Scott tells everyone, “I did some research while I was waiting onboard the Enterprise. The main city on this planet is Bloop. They’re going to start powering it by using trilithium crystals. Not suitable for use on starships, the way dilithium is. Much too hazardous. Very powerful though. One crystal can power the entire city. That must be why the Klingons want it.”

Jack says, “Trilithium? The guy we caught in the bar said something about that! They’re gathering Trilithium.”

Spock says, “That would explain it. Even a small quantity of the substance would be highly valuable to them.”

11:37 pm – While the rest of them discuss this, Kirk corners Chloe. He says, “So, are you an alien?”

Chloe says, “No, I’m human.”

Kirk seems disappointed, “O.K., never mind then. When we beam down to a planet, I usually find an alien to fall in love with before the mission is over.”

11:38 pm – In the center of Bloop, a group of Klingons are making announcements. One of them says, “I am Moog, commander of the Bird of Prey, Bok! Cooperate with us, and you will not be harmed!” They crowd seems to think this is pretty fair, so they go along with the Klingons right away. Moog is a bit taken aback by having such an easy time taking over. He regains his composure and tells the crowd to take him to their trilithium storage facility.

11:40 pm – The Chinese terrorists are already at the trilithium storage facility. While the rest of the terrorists stands guard, one of them holds a small briefcase, and another puts the trilithium crystal into it. One of the guards warns the group that someone is coming to the facility. They all run around the back of the facility and off into the woods towards the south as the Klingons and the people from Bloop arrive at the building from the north.

11:42 pm – Moog is enraged when he finds out the trilithium is gone. He calls to his ship, and is told the trilithium sensors indicate it is moving south and away from the building. Moog orders his men out of the back of the building.

11:43 pm – As Kirk, Jack and the rest of the group arrive on the outskirts of the town, they are surprised to see the Chinese terrorists run right past them! Jack regains his composure, takes aim, and hits the last of the terrorists in the leg. He vaporized his whole thigh, which is NOT something Jack was expecting. He’s so surprised he doesn’t think to run after the rest of the terrorists.

Jack snaps out of it and runs to the man he shot. He’s dead. The rest of the group catches up with Jack. McCoy says, “Damn it, I’m a doctor, not a doctor! …. Wait a second, that doesn’t make sense.” Mr. Scott says, “I didn’t even know a shot like that was possible!” McCoy says, “Neither did I. It did cauterize the wound though…”

Just as McCoy says this, a Star Fleet shuttle craft zooms over their heads. Chloe says, “I thought we got most of the terrorists already. There must have been five more than the last time we saw them! How are they doing that?”

The Klingons run out of the back of the building and turn to watch the shuttle craft that just zoomed over their heads. Jack sees that one of the Klingons is holding another terrorist. The Klingons are so preoccupied with the shuttlecraft they don’t notice the people from the Enterprise. One of the Klingons pulls out a device and says something into it. They start to dematerialize, and as they do, Jack runs for them. He grabs one of the Klingons, and a moment later he’s gone!

11:46 pm – Kirk says, “We have to go after them!” He opens his communicator, “Kirk to Enterprise! Beam me aboard!”

A 2 by 4 materializes at Kirk’s feet. Kirk says, “That gets less funny every time they do that.”

Commercial

11:51 pm – On board the Klingon ship, Moog sits at a table facing Jack, who is standing in front of him, a guard on either side. Moog looks at a big knife in his hand and says, “Give me a reason not to kill you where you stand.”

Jack says, “You were in a pretty big hurry, running after the same people I’ve been chasing. My guess is that they’ve got the trilithium you’re after.” The Klingons look at each other, surprised that Jack knows about the trilithium. Jack continues, “I’ll get you a sample of that trilithium!”

Moog laughs, “Why would we need the help of a human?”

Jack says, “Well, you would, I suppose, if you were afraid to go after it yourself.”

Moog stops laughing, and pounds his fist on the table. “You have insulted me, human! Prepare for battle! Moog turns the table over, and heads for Jack.

11:53 pm – Everyone is back on the bridge of Enterprise, except Mr. Scott, who has gone back to engineering. Captain Kirk orders that they scan the area for the Klingon’s ship and for the stolen shuttle craft. He says, “We have to get to that shuttle before the Klingons find it.” He presses a button, “Mr. Scott! I need those sensors back online immediately!”

11:55 pm – Mr. Scott is at his wit’s end. “I’m doing the best that I can!” Everyone scrambles around. Chloe points to a button on the console near Mr. Spock, and asks, “What is that?” She presses the button, and the sensors come back online.

11:56 pm – Kirk orders, “Main viewer on!” A large screen on one wall of the bridge flickers on. They seen the Klingon ship they’ve been looking for. It’s facing them and it fills the entire screen. Kirk says, “Red alert!” A woman near Kirk says, “The Klingon Bird of Prey is hailing us, sir!” Kirk says, “Let’s have it!”

11:57 pm – Jack appears on the main viewer. He’s sitting in Moog’s command chair, holding Moog’s knife. Jack says, “I have everything under control here. Any word on that shuttle craft?”

Kirk looks amused, “No… no word yet. We’re working on it.”

11:58 pm – Aboard the shuttle craft, one of the terrorists talks into a walkie-talkie and says, “We have the crystal.” There’s a brilliant flash of light.

11:59 pm – Jack finds himself sitting on the ground on a street corner, still holding Moog’s knife. There’s a palm tree next to him. A Ferrari Testarossa drives up. A man wearing a white suit and a turquoise shirt says to Jack, “Well, don’t just sit there! Get in!”

12:00 midnight – Time’s up!